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Archive for November, 2012

Two-and-a-Half Men thoughts

November 29, 2012 Leave a comment

I’ve read that Angus T. Jones, who plays the kid on Two-and-a-Half Men, has trashed the show as filthy.

Soon, Jones will tell us that Russian winters are cold or that Nicole “Snookie” Polizzi is short.

Apparently, Jones became a Christian recently or belongs to a church with strict guidelines. This reminds me of Kirk Cameron, who starred as the extremely-mischevious Mike Seaver on the popular sitcom Growing Pains and, after becoming a Christian, abruptly insisted on lots of unpopular changes to the show (such as a retooling of his character, and the firing of his love interest due to her affiliation with Playboy.

Jones, like Cameron, appears to be off to a choppy start as a Christian. That happens.

Some think Chuck Lorre may fire Jones from 2.5 Men as he did Charlie Sheen when Sheen trashed the show and mumbled incoherently about winning, tiger’s blood and goddesses.

I’ve never watched the show, and it’s for the same reasons: to me, it’s a filthy show. And, besides, isn’t it tiresome seeing Jon Cryer’s character always on the receiving end of wimpness?

How this show has lasted as long as it has tells me just how low-brow American humor is.

Agree? Disagree? Think Richard’s an idiot (THAT’S a long line!)? Post comments here or e-mail them to fromatozowie@gmail.com.

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Richard’s Theory on College Scholarships

November 27, 2012 Leave a comment

I know of a very bright young man who was unable to attend a particular Michigan university due to lack of funds. The university had the program he wanted to study (it’s in the performing arts), but without the right scholarships and money, it was out of his reach.

I look at professional sports and think of athletes like Deion Sanders and Vinny Testaverde and how while they left college after four years to go pro, they were considerably short of earning their degrees. Currently, it’s not at all unusual for football and basketball players to leave college after their junior years to go pro. Some go pro after only one season in college.

Why not this rule: Any college athlete who leaves college to go pro and has not completed their degree, out of their first professional paycheck the cost of their scholarship must be garnished.

Ironic, isn’t it, how so many who’d love to go to college can’t afford it while money and scholarships instead are spent on athletes, many of whom are solely at college to get tuned up for pro ball?

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It snowed yesterday

November 26, 2012 Leave a comment

I don’t like driving in the snow, especially heavy snow or when the roads are icy and shiny due to rainfall that proceeds 20-degree weather.

I slid on the road once last winter and a few times the year before. Then there was the early morning of my 35th birthday on February 6, 2008. I tried driving to work in Davison, Mich., during a blizzard that dropped two feet of snow in 24 hours. Ended up in a ditch and was pulled out by a complete stranger. Returned home and barely made it as I slid along the way.

Sometimes, I think my ideal job is one where I can telecommute 100% of the time. If my internet goes down, I can just pack up my laptop and walk a mile to McDonald’s. I suppose it would be nice to be within walking distance of my bank and a grocery store, but perhaps going to those places every few days when the weather lets up would be sufficient.

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What I’m up to in acting

November 21, 2012 Leave a comment

About a month ago, we finished our run at the Clio Cast & Crew of Wait Until Dark. In the play, I was Sam Hendrix, husband of the blind lead character Susy Hendrix.

It was an enjoyable time, and I loved the crew I worked with. Some were new (Pam Beauchamp and Connor Klee) and some I’d worked with before (Bill Kircher, Ed Nelson, Chris Dinnan and Alex Vincent).

It was also a learning experience as I had more lines than I did in the previous play. Acting is a process: learning the lines, learning the blocking and then saying the lines and doing the blocking in character.

Is it harder than it sounds? Yes. But I enjoy it thoroughly.

The rehearsals tended to drain on my time, and I’m planning to take a few plays off before trying out for another one near the end of winter.

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Dallas Cowboys owner/president/general manager Jerry Jones gets an intervention

November 15, 2012 Leave a comment

From A to Zowie

Dallas Cowboys owner/president/general manager Jerry Jones gets an intervention

By Richard Zowie

As of this writing, the Dallas Cowboys are 4-5 after having defeated the Philadelphia Eagles 38-23 on November 11. It has been 17 years since the Cowboys last won a Super Bowl.

As Dallas tries to reach for .500 when they play the Cleveland Browns, many problems still loom. Will the Cowboys re-sign Tony Romo in the off-season? Will the offense finally start clicking? Will Felix Jones regain his old form? Will the Cowboys make the playoffs? Will Jason Garrett keep his job, or will we see him in the unemployment line in Dallas County? Will the Cowboys replace him with Mike Holmgren or Sean Payton? Will Dez Bryant remove the pacifier from his mouth and replace it with a mouth guard?

And, will Jerry Jones finally come clean about an embarrassing problem that could wind him up in rehab?

We can only hope…

…Jerry Jones sits in his office at Cowboys Stadium. For the last half hour he has been pondering two deals: the corporate sponsorship for Cowboys Stadium (the only sponsors officially ruled out have been Philadelphia Cream Cheese, Red Man Chewing Tobacco and Green Giant vegetables) and what toppings to put on his dinner pizza from Papa John’s (he’s leaning towards pepperoni, black olives and onions).

The door opens. In walks Gene Jones, Jerry’s wife, along with his sons, Stephen and Jerry Jr., and his daughter Charlotte. Also joining them are retired Cowboy legends Troy Aikman, Roger Staubach, Emmitt Smith, Tony Dorsett and Randy White. They all have grim looks on their faces, as if Chuck Norris has just lost an arm wrestling match to Iron Man.

Jerry: Um, what is going on? My birthday was LAST month.

Gene: This has nothing to do with your birthday, Jerry.

Jerry (looking at Staubach, Dorsett and White): Guys, I have apologized countless times for how I fired Tom Landry.

Roger: This has nothing to do with how you fired Coach Landry, Jerry.

Jerry: Nobody’s paycheck bounced, did it?

Stephen: No, Dad. Financially, you’re worth over $2 billion. Everybody’s getting paid.

(Jerry lets out a deep sigh of relief).

Stephen: Dad, all of us love you and respect you very much, but it’s time we made you realize what everybody in the organization and everybody in Texas already knows.

Jerry: What’s that?

Gene: Sweetie, you’re a great marketer and brilliant businessman, but as team president and general manager of the Cowboys, you, um, well, um…

Dorsett: Jerry, what your wife is trying to say is that as team president and general manager you stink worse than Limburger cheese.

Intervention? I don’t need no stinkin’ intervention!!!

Jerry: Gene, I love ya, but that’s just your opinion…wait, does EVERYBODY here feel this way?

ALL (in perfect unison): YES!!!

Jerry: What makes y’all say that? I’ve found some pretty talented guys?

Emmitt: You mean like Quincy Carter, Chad Hutchinson, Clint Stoerner and Shaunte Carter? Jerry, no other teams even had Quincy on their draft board! You took him in the second round but probably could’ve signed him as an un-drafted free agent!

Randy: And what on earth is your obsession with football players who tried to play baseball but failed, Jerry? I mean, Carter, Hutchison and Drew Henson?

Troy: Jerry, there’s no shame in admitting you’re not good at assessing talent. I mean, you drafted David Buehler because he had a strong leg–never mind if the goalposts were five miles apart, he’d STILL shank field goals wide left.

Jerry: But that doesn’t mean I’m not good at assessing talent!

Jerry Jr.: Dad, besides those players, do you also remember thinking Barry Switzer would be a great NFL coach, and not to mention removing your support from Bill Parcells and backing Terrell Owens! Let’s face it: Jimmy Johnson had great talent at picking talented players and personnel. You don’t have that talent.

Charlotte: Daddy, here’s what we’re gonna do. We will escort you to a black SUV waiting outside, then to the airport and then to the Betty Ford Clinic. They have doctors there who specialize in professional sports owners who micromanage and think they know far more about their sport than they really do…

What will happen? Time will tell? My guess is that if Jerry Jones swallows his pride and completes the program, maybe someday soon Cowboys Stadium will become Betty Ford Clinic Stadium as a symbol of gratitude.

Richard Zowie grew up in Beeville and is a 1991 graduate of A.C. Jones High School. He currently lives with his sons in Vassar, Michigan. Post your comments here or e-mail Richard at fromatozowie@gmail.com.

Sedona Trail in Arizona…I MUST do that someday!

November 14, 2012 Leave a comment

On PBS’ Create TV, they have a program about bicycling along Arizona’s Sedona Trail.

I’ve driven through Arizona a few times in my life and think it is a gorgeous state.

Someday I would love to take a bicycle out there and bike on this trail. The clear skies, the red, mountainous rocks, the cactii, the sparce vegetation. To me, it looks like it would be an absolute blast.

Having grown up in South Texas, I love the Southwest. One ring I wear has Native American designs on it. It reminds me that I am 1/16 Native American (my great-great-grandmother was from Oklahoma Territory; we are uncertain which tribe she was from) and that I am from the Southwest.

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