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My humorous look at 2008

I’ve just sent in two columns to the Beeville Bee-Picayune, both being my humorous look back on 2008. Here’s a sampling:

In an effort to curtail California’s budget problems, Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger offers to reprise his role as an emotionless robot from The Terminator and go back in time and kill the mothers of overspending California congressman before the future pork spenders are even born.

Iran launches its first rocket into space. On board is Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. Unfortunately, due to a programming error, the rocket is sent on a one-way trip to the next galaxy, the Andromeda Galaxy, three million light years away.

Those who misprogrammed the Iranian rocket’s computer are nominated for Nobel Peace Prizes.

Prior to the opening of the baseball season the Houston Astros hold an exhibition game against the University of Texas. As expected, the Astros lose 129-0.

The Texas House passes legislation that makes it a crime to sell, buy or consume picante salsa manufactured in New York City.

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