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No, I’m not talking about the bovine dairy product, although I do love chocolate milk. Instead, I’m referring to the Sean Penn movie about the 1970s San Francisco city council member who was openly gay and led gay rights movements in the city. He was later murdered.

Ok, let me make it clear: I believe the Bible has clear teachings on homosexuality. Be that as it may, I don’t hate gays. Some of my all-time favorite co-workers have been gay; one was a fellow writer who shared many of the same interests as I did. But for three reasons I have no desire to see this movie.

1. It has Sean Penn in it. While Penn’s not a horrible actor, I hardly think of him in a class with the all-time greats like Robert DeNiro or Jack Nicholson or Gary Oldman. Besides, Penn’s political views are as ridiculous as his Fast Times at Ridgemont High Jeff Spicoli character.

2. I have zero confidence Hollywood will be historically accurate about a movie like this.

3. I’m a heterosexual man, and I’d rather throw up and eat my own vomit than watch a love scene between two men–especially when one of them’s Penn.

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